Meet the Women Behind Doyenne: Inspiring Stories from Our Leaders

Emily Gray South Coast Doyenne Ambassador

What is the biggest challenge you've faced as a woman in this field, and how did you overcome it?

The biggest challenge that I have faced has probably been my own self-doubt and lack of confidence.  It took a long time for me to value my contributions and stand up for myself to say where I needed help and to ask for things that I wanted.  That is still something that I struggle with but I am getting better at it.  Having strong female role models really helps to think about what they would do in a situation and then go for it!  After all, if we don’t ask and just wait for something to come to us, it may never arrive.  At least if you ask and get a “no” you can make some decisions on how you want to go forward on that.

Can you share your happiest memory from your time in the industry?

I have so many happy memories from my time within the industry.  The absolute stand out, though, is winning Property Woman of the Year at the inaugural ARMA Ace Awards.  I entered with no expectations and was amazed to be shortlisted and absolutely floored to have won when there were some really amazing women alongside me in that category. 

How do you balance your professional responsibilities with your personal life?

I used to be really bad at this and work took priority over everything else to the point that I felt that I was one person at work and someone completely different at home, and neither of those people was the real me.  Having worked with a coach recently I have now been able to resolve those different personalities and I now feel that I am totally myself, whether it be at work, at home, or just in my head.   I have a young son and I love spending time with him, but I also really enjoy my full-time job.  Being able to spend some time with my son in the morning as he gets ready and reading him a bedtime story every night are highlights of my day.  I suffer from “mum guilt” but that does help with my work-life balance as it prompts me to spend time with my son and husband when I am not working.

What book has had the most significant impact on your life and why?

I love self-development books at the moment and there are many that I could list off as helping with confidence, leadership etc.  However, to be honest the book which has had the biggest impact has been Marie Kondo’s The Life Changing Magic of Tidying Up.  Thanks to that book I have been able to let go of a lot of things that I didn’t want/need and to treasure the things that I really value.  The biggest thing though is that I can now fold all my clothes wonderfully and have lovely, neat and tidy drawers where I can see everything.  I really enjoy folding clothes as it gives me some mindful time to myself and at the end of it I have a nice neat pile of clothes that is easy to put away.

What motivates you to get up and go to work every day?

I don’t think that there is any one thing that motivates me.  I get up for me - to move forward with my goals, for my family – to be able to provide for them and give us nice things, for my team – to see them grow and move forward, for the industry – to try and make a change and see the passion in others doing the same.  I am not a morning person so it is not easy to wake up but once I am up, I am up and raring to go!

Who has been the biggest influence in your life or career?

I can’t say that there has been any one person who has influenced me.  It has been the network of amazing people that I have connected to throughout my time in the industry.  Being part of Doyenne has been a fantastic part of that.  I am regularly inspired by the amazing women in our network, hearing their stories, their determination and passion for what we do, and knowing that we are all making a difference to each other.  I hope to inspire and influence others to have the same passion that I do and to show that what you see on the surface, is only the tip of the iceberg.  We all have plenty of other things going on that might not be so visible.

What's a personal goal you are currently working towards?

My goal for 2025 is to get a bit fitter.  I am setting myself a monthly goal to increase the number of steps I am doing.  I started at an average of 3000 a day two months ago.  I am now aiming for a 5000 average a day and actually hitting 7500 a day.  As I am typing this I am walking on my walk pad with my laptop setup on the ironing board above it.  I have also been going out for walks in the morning before work and longer walks at the weekend.  I have signed up for a virtual walking challenge and just completed a virtual 46-mile walk to the top of Mount Fuji, I got a lovely medal as a result.  I am now making my way down the Florida Keys! 

Would you rather have the ability to speak all languages fluently or be a master of every musical instrument?

This is a really tricky one for me as I did languages at school and at university (for a short while).  I have also played musical instruments since I was young.  However, I think that the languages just win it for me.  Communication is key to developing relationships and being able to connect with people in their own language would be absolutely amazing.  I can always persevere with some practice on my musical instruments but accept that I will never be the next Jess Gillam, Lang-Lang or Evelyn Glennie.

If you could only eat one food for the rest of your life, what would it be?

I haven’t got an answer for that one.  To only eat one food forever would be so boring when there is so much variety in the food that we can enjoy.   However, I do have a constant craving for Buttermilk Fried Chicken so I could probably work with that being a part of each meal, as long as I can have something colourful with it!

If you could have any fictional character as your best friend, who would you choose and why?

I started thinking Disney Princesses but I am going to go a little closer to home and say, Bridget Jones.  Having just watched the most recent, and last, film in the franchise, she has remained a fiercely loyal friend throughout and she always gets into plenty of fun situations, and some which perhaps just make me feel a bit better about my own chaos!

How do you unwind after a long day at work?

When I am working in the office it is a drive home with some great music blaring, usually a musical playlist, and singing along at the top of my voice.  If I am working from home then it is going for a walk with my son to get some fresh air and also tire him out so that he sleeps!  A glass of wine and good chocolate also helps too!

What's a fun fact about you that most people don't know?!!

Before reading this you probably didn’t know that I was mad about folding clothes!  You may also not know that I play the saxophone, flute and percussion to a Grade 6 level.  I also love a pin badge!

If you could travel anywhere in the world, where would you go and why?

Japan – I have always wanted to go and see the cherry blossoms and the amazing landscape there.  The language barrier puts me off, but if I am fluent in all languages that will sort that out, as I need to know what I am eating and like to have some independence in being able to get around.  I would also love to go to New Zealand.  We were planning to go for our Honeymoon but we then found out I was pregnant and so 10 days after getting married, instead of jetting off on our honeymoon, I was in hospital with my newborn son in my arms.  I wouldn’t change that ever!

What's your favourite inspirational quote or mantra?

Nothing is impossible, the word itself says I’m possible – Audrey Hepburn (who is also an icon!)

What is the biggest lesson you have learnt in life?

You learn the most from your mistakes, embrace them and you will grow stronger for them.  Find the opportunity in the problem and SMILE!

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